- "It turns out that the light at the end of the tunnel is just a "Laser Floyd" show."
- "Before I die, I'd like to let you know that, although I love you all very much, I'm going to make you fight to the death in a televised cage match in order to win my inheritance. It will be hosted by an Elvis impersonator handpicked by myself and my invisible pet monkey 'Jubjub'."
- "Either you find a way to end world hunger within the hour, or I will set off a 1 megaton bomb I have hidden somewhere under the grounds of Shel Silverstein's birthplace..."
- "Wait... I... I see a light! There's people here... (Gasp) Someone's walking towards me... It's ... It's Aunt Cassie! Wait... She... She has something... IT'S A GUN! SHE HAS A GUN!!!"
- Banzai Motherf---a's!
I've always wanted to go to one of those Laser shows... Maybe next Summer...
Awesome idea... Expect to see this on FOX by mid-2008:
"FOX presents: 'Inheritance Cage Match!"
I originally said a 10 megaton bomb, but when I did some research I found out that,"About 1 Mt equivalent exploded on the ground or slightly above ground creates a crater about 0.3 miles (0.5 km) in diameter and levels practically everything in a few mile or kilometer radius. It is enough to crush underground bunkers at a depth of about 1000 feet." (Source: Wikipedia.org)I figured that would probably be enough...Remember kids, the only reason that this is funny is because I have a sick sense of humor.
And now for a special "Authors Cut":
In every post there is something I leave out, whether it is because it is too vulgar or doesn't make enough sense. Here is one of those things:
Last Words (Deleted Sentence):
